updates

Just a brief update on several issues.  First and foremost, it has now been 2 weeks since an ant has been sighted in the apartment.  I am talking not one single ant.  I am shocked.  When we bombed the house, I thought it would be a couple days before they were back, but no ants since.  The ants continue to amaze me, lol.

Gas prices are insane here and it now costs $60 to fill up the FIESTA.  OMG, Fiesta has the smallest tank known to mankind.  It is like $6.20 a gallon here.  Good thing I don't go anywhere!!

Lastly, I start my new job on Monday.  I just did 2 hours of boring-ass reading, and I have more to do.  I told old job I was taking cappuccino machine with me as a bonus when I left -- they were like WTF are you talking about.  One guy just responded with, "WHY?"  Because I want it, bitch!  Word is you have to PAY for caps at new place, wtf?  I want that shit free!

You know youre a chunkaaa when

you start eating the food before even removing it from the microwave!  Chunkaaa just snagged a chicken wing right off the plate still in the microwave.  Speaking of chunkaaa, I was whining to peeps in other office today how I don't know anyone in Darwin (they are all in south australia).  One dude says, "When I lived in Darwin, I met all my friends at the Darwin Cross Fit." Me: "No way." Him: "You should really try it, I wasnt good at it at first either...and I still can't do a handstand push up, but it is fun and the people are nice."  Me: "I want to just join regular gym."  Him:  "My wife is coming there on Tuesday, she will take you to cross fit."

Ahhhhh!!  I dont want to go!!  Leave me alone!  Lil chunkaaas dont belong at xfit.  Besides, it's way too expensive - $150 a month, which I honestly cant afford.  Regular gym is $40 a month, more in my budget.  Jeez, effing crossfit is the last thing I feel like doing!

Yesterday was an overall crazy day for me that left my head spinning.  At 9am my phone rang, it's gov job.  "Hi, you got the job.  Even though it's been since December, we need you right away...  when can you start?"  Uhhhhh..idk I have to tell my boss and get back to you.  "Ok, please come in to the office as soon as you can."    I tell my boss, she is a little panicked and asks me to stay til the 26th.  She had been planning on me not getting the job, I think.  This Monday was supposed to be the "we need to know if youre staying" talk.  12:45 phone rings again, but I miss the call.  It's a cell phone, but I don't recognize the number.  It's "robust" job!  Wtf could he want.  Call him back, he says they have new positions opening up and would like to offer me a marketing role.  WTFFFFFF??  Only catch is it is a serious (18 months of training before promotion) commitment to living in Darwin.  And not in my field....  I pass and say wtf is going on?  Back in Dec, I couldnt even get temp agencies to call me, now I have 3 job offers.  THEN a mishap with my paycheck ended with 60% of weekly earnings going to taxes...major ouchie!

Obvs I accepted gov job as it is the most interesting and in my field. I went in today and met with my boss.  He gave me a STACK of reading to catch up on before I start.  Homework!  But I am excited :)  I will spend a lot of my time going to court, as I am working with a legal services team.  However... I sit in a square and directly opposite me is my boss :-/  Are the days of gchat and recipe searching over???

batten down the hatches!

Last week I was bitching incessantly about the ants.  If I spoke to you, I probably somehow managed to work the ants into the conversation.  One woman at work said to me "Ants going crazy?  Means a cyclone's brewin'."  I was like ok crazy lady.  We haven't had a cyclone all year (btw, cyclone is known as hurricane at home) and wouldn't the weather people be telling us if there was a cyclone? Well, today I was sent home from work at 12:30 because a cyclone is hitting Darwin.  Unlike hurricanes, we don't get advanced warning here because they literally form right off the coast.  Yesterday there was about a 50% chance a cyclone was forming -- something about the highs and lows -- and today it's here!  Well, so far just rain.  Can ants predict weather??

So I got sent home from work, walked home just before the rain started and managed to move my plants to safety -- have to take care of what's important.  Last week it rained so hard it knocked every leaf off my chili pepper plants, now they are just sticks. It's really trial and error here with the plants.  I dont get why I am so bad at gardening.  I love my plants a lot, but I would say only 50% love me back.  

Now I am just chillin on the couch, what to do, what to do...

:-P

Ack!  Someone tell me why I am on this Pinterest?!  I dont need to know that "pizza pancakes" or "jalapeno popper grilled cheese sandwiches" exist!  I am getting fatter just looking at this thing.  And every kind of "cupcake" you can ever imagine -- chix pot pie...cupcake!  lasagna...cupcake!  And as if eating cadbury creme eggs isnt chunkaaa-ish enough, there is a recipe on there to bake one into the center of a cupcake and then frost it.  OMGChunka!  

Anyway, I have been staring at that shit for about an hour now.   Mostly all it does it make me upset that I cant eat any of these foods, then I will stumble upon something likea stupid quinoia burger print that...I am sure it's just as good as a lasagna cupcake, lol mmm lasagna!  Ok, enough!

More talk of food, I have compiled a list of Darwin restaurants I wish to dine in.  These are all the hot spots, lol.  I crossed one off the list this weekend.  It was a Japanese/sushi restaurant.  Now, Japanese and Mexican are tied for my fav food genres, and we already know how the Darwin Mexican turned out.  Japanese was better, but not by much.  No, I take it back, it was just as bad, but a little cheaper.  There are 2 sushi restaurants around that I know about.  One is in the mall...  we are not talking the Century City food court here either.  It's next to the Big W (Walmart), which pretty much sums that up -- I sound snobby, but that's no surprise.  Anyway, that place is wildly popular, always crowded.  It's a "sushi train" which, believe me, sounds way cooler than it is.  You sit at the sushi bar, only they are not making the food directly in front of  you like other sushi bars.  Instead it's traveling by you on a conveyor belt, aka "train."  It reminds me so much of a hospital cafeteria and I expect to see jello going by.  Basically, every color plate is a different price.  You grab what you want right off the train, and at the end they count up your red, yellow, and blue plates.  Horrifying, right?  AND the sushi looks nasty!  They have shit like "chicken roll" and "chili beef roll."  WTF is that???  Sounds like a nacho!  I dont want to eat that shit!  


Despite my better judgement and knowledge of Darwin, I psyched myself up to eat at the not-in-the-mall sushi restaurant in the city.  I knew they had that dumb ass train, but not being in the mall gave it an automatic advantage in my mind.  I was wrong :(  When we walked in, I was immediately put off by the mere presence of the train!  Trying to be open minded (lol, you know this is not my strength) I offered to sit at the sushi train, but Jason could sense my unsettledness and chose a table.  We ordered tuna sashimi and tempura veggies to start, with a beer and sake of course.  Sake was a small bottle for $10 and sooooo gross!  Tasted like ass.  Then the sashimi came and much to my dismay, despite not being seated at the train, they still just grabbed it off the train and gave it to me.  Plus it was salmon, not tuna.  THEN tempura came which was stuck together onion rings and carrot.  UGHHH -- I won't go on, this meal did not improve.  Just strengthens my thought that I should not go out to eat!  

In other news, no ants today, not one sighting.  And mini eggs are gone --- they, uhh, just disappeared...
Also, cyclone is brewing off the coast, which is esp bad because we have one vehicle right now and I walk to work.  Walk to work in the cyclone????

we got food everywhere as if the party was catered

Cadbury is big at home, especially around Easter, but it is huge in Australia all year long.  Generally, there are all the usual suspects -- giant candy bars, creme eggs at Easter -- but they have even more, like ice cream and cute little koala bears filled with caramel.  (FYI - I nearly shit my pants when I saw the ice cream the first time, but it's not as good as I thought it would be!  I was picturing like creme eggs ice cream, but flavor selection blows...USA ice cream is far superior to all Australian ice creams thus far.  Also sucking here is the delicious Skinny Cow... same brand, different treats, not as good, and soooo pricey!).  Anyway, I was surprised to not see the (in)famous Cadbury mini eggs around in the grocery store.  I was looking, but not too hard, as I wanted and didnt want to find them at the same time.  But, last weekend, there they were set up along the wall in the register line at Target, along with a million other treats I dont even know about...calling me.  They dont sell the individual size, so I was forced to buy the big one.  Fuckin A, every time I look in the fridge -- even just for water -- I come out with a lil chunkaaa paw full of mini eggs.  Why are they so good?!?!?  Mini eggs must be destroyed, and I am taking it personally upon myself to see to their demise...in my tummy. Also shocking is that Jason thinks peanut M&Ms are better than mini eggs!  I think he's insane!  Does anyone else think this???

In Darwin news, lots going on. We bombed the house yesterday and fucked up those ants big time.  I just couldnt take it anymore.  The bombs worked, and there are dead ants in places I didnt even know we had ants.  It is sooooooo nice to cook or sit at the counter and not see a single ant.  I could not be happier!  Somewhat troubling was the appearance of 2 rogue ants late in the evening today. They were spotted on the ceiling, but I havent seen any of their friends around since.  Should we take bets on how long before they are back in full swing?  I give it 2 more days before they are filtering back to behind the sink.

We obvs had to leave the house while the chemical warfare was taking place, so we went to this farmers' market type place about a mile from my house.  It was so cute, and it exists in Darwin!  The only bad thing was it was so incredibly crowded, I couldnt deal with being there for very long.  Tons of veggies, food stands, local plants and flowers, and of course like any market, some nice things for sale, but mostly handmade junk people think they can sell at ridiculous prices.  Seriously, why do so many people think they can make jewelry?  Your shit is ugly, fo real.  But it is so nice to have found this place!  I got some coffee beans, olive oil, veggies,and a dim sim for a snack (obvs there was a snack involved!).  Really like it there, but due to the amount of other people who also seem to really like it, I think I need to identify key sellers, get in there, get my shit, and get out.  And so many kids :-/

Lastly, I asked for recipes a couple weeks ago and got limited responses.  Send me your shit!  Even if it is just a link, I am so sick of EVERYTHING I make!  Please!

A to the N to the T to the S

So it's been a while since I have talked about the ants.  You might be thinking, "I wonder what is happening with Al and her ant problem," because I am sure that is what you sit at home and think about.  Well, if this has been weighing on your mind, let me fill you in.  Ants are out of fucking control!!! Tomorrow it comes down to chemical warfare, the day we have all been dreading.

I had put the borax sugar mix out a few weeks ago when they were attacking the drawers.  This mix seemed to get rid of drawer ants, but had no effect on ants in other areas, leading me to believe they were from separate colonies.  After drawer ants were gone, no one was touching big poison pile, so I moved it closer to another ant "hot spot" behind the stove.  Ants are eating that shit up, but at the same time, they have now established a path that runs from my hallway into the untidy upstairs neighbor place.  They are clearly running their crumbs from upstairs to the nest, which must be below our floor/outside.  At random times I have been finding them in my room too, particularly if I leave my laptop on the floor.  I told my co-worker about it and she totally freaked me out.  Apparently her mom had the same problem and then one day her comp stopped working -- turns out ants ate the wiring and shit never turned on again!  Obvs I am freaked!  Last night I took lap top apart and looks like all is good there, but I did some google research and this is a real thing!  Ants like to eat wires!  They have a history of destroying comps.

This morning, I was getting dressed when I noticed ants in my bedroom closet.  What the fucking fuck?  They have never been there before!  I wiped them away and thought, why the fuck would they be in here.  It's clothes only, no food/chunka snacks or anything.  It didnt take much investigation to discover they were eating Jason's leather belt which was hanging in the corner!  Now this is a belt that matches a suit which he hasnt worn for months!  There's no food on this belt, they are actually going for the leather.  I was ready to leave for work, so I washed it in the sink and left.  Come home 8 hours later, belt is covered!  AFTER I WASHED IT!  Now they are just everywhere.  In tupperwares, sealed packages, etc.  So tomorrow, we bomb.  And we will complain to the landlord, but what can you really do when you live in an apt complex??  in darwin!  is there any escaping the ANTS?!?!?!

hello? is it me you're looking for

It's Saturday night.  I am fully stocked with snacks (cheese, crackers, hummus I made) and wine was buy one get one free, so I have 2 bottles.  And I am home alone because I have not one single friend to come over and sit on the couch talking shit or have a dance party :-(  WEHHHHHHHH!!!  weh weh WEH!!!  However, before you offer suggestions on how I should go about friend-making, I will say this.  My heart is just not in it.  I am sick of moving and "putting myself out there."  As an adult, I have made some really great, great friends.  I want those friends, not new ones.  I know Darwin is short term and I am moving again in less than 2 years.  So what's the point?  Well, I guess I should stop whining then.  wehh

But as it turns out, I dont really have a choice.  The 3 months of solitude is approaching (btw -- good news, it will be 3 months minus 2 weeks in the middle).  Maybe I need just one friend.  It is so much easier to meet other people when you are not rolling solo all the time.  If I have just one friend, they might know people and I will have several friends!  It could happen...are there people like me in Darwin???

Big news going on is some camper is missing so they are searching the bodies of crocs to see if he got eaten, lol.  Also some dumbass at the wildlife park was up in the lion cage scratching the lion and he got fucked up.  HAHAHA, lion was not having it!  Argh, and there is a gecko in my room right now and I dont know how to get it out, but I dont want to sleep in there with it running around!!!!  omg!