Wet season

Otherwise known as chunkaaa season.  It's hot, so hot.  You might associate immense heat with losing weight but for the second (and I could argue 3rd year in a row since I was here for half wet season 2011), I am gaining weight because it's too hot to move.  It's 94 and humid every single day with tropical sun beating down.  I still get hungry so I still eat, but my lunch time walks have been replaced with sitting and avoiding the outdoors.  I go to the gym, but what I do in the gym is 90% of my exercise for the whole day, I dont move otherwise.  Same routine everyday:  go to work, complain about how cold the AC is.  Lunch, instead of walking, I go home and eat at my house since it is not acceptable to go back to work smelling and soaked in sweat.  After work I go to the gym and then usually Jason and I will walk around Bayview (like 2 miles).  Then I will eat and sit on couch and complain about how hot it is til I go to bed.  In the morning, I complain about having a headache and my nose being permanently crusty from being in constant air conditioning.  The cycle is vicious!  Luckily, I have something to complain about at all times :-P

Anyway, in heat like this you need to drink a lot of water, which is something I am not particularly good at.  Considering I am a chunkaaa, I thought I would start drinking the spicy lemonade shit I drank on the master cleanse without the maple syrup (so basically lemon water and cayenne pepper).  The lemon is supposed to be cleansing while the cayenne jump starts your metabolism.  While I still down this shit all day long, I know it's a bunch of BS.  I will tell you why:  1.  When I did Master Cleanse back in Jan 07, they said on day 2 you would start experiencing hot poop, which meant your body was ridding itself of toxins which apparently burned on their exit (must be super toxic). Or it could be the cayenne pepper that I guzzled all day because I am in no way currently cleansing (last night's dinner was wine and velveeta for thanksgiving) but I am pooping hot!  UGH so naive!  ALSO, they sell this spicy sizzle syrup here in bottles marketed as "cleansing lemonade" which I paid $3 for a couple weeks ago.  It was the same shit!  $3 for a small ass bottle that tasted like ass. SCAM.  But why I am I still drinking this damn drink?  I will never learn.

MOST IMPORTANTLY, I am peacing out of the shit hole for 6 WHOLE WEEKS, leaving on Dec 5th.  I am going to Singapore and then HOME.  Just 12 days away!  Ok, I know this post sucks but I am tired as shit and half sleeping.  No proof reading so apologize in advance for the rants.  Tomorrow is celebrating thanksgiving and since we cant get an actual turkey I am making a giant whole fish.  Idk wtf I am doing.  lololol

Skinny rules!

So I am on pinterest all the time, but I never pin anything because I just keep my links in my own google doc.  I have to first check out the recipe before I know if I will like it - the pic is just there to entice (btw I cant believe how many blogs and amateur cooking sites there are now!).

Anyway, I came across this gem tonight.  20 rules to be skinny?!  Sounds like a lot.  I can already rule out a number of these "rules"- rule out as in it's not even worth trying.  Obvs #2 unless they invent diet wine sometime soon, this is not happening.  No carbs after lunch def a no go.  And who wants to go to bed hungry?  The apples and berries is def not happening either, Bob.  Those are like rare delicacies in Aus!  A small container of blueberries is $8!  Yes, I am not lying, the little one! Prolly the only these rules I have mastered are 8 and 20.  Oh and prolly 15.  What would Bob think of Roll it up:  Spring Roll Fang Zi?  I think it would be banned after lunch time.  Not cool.

Roll it up

I will start running again this week.
I will start running again this week.
I will start running again, ok! day after tomorrow!

I have been unemployed the last 4 weeks with only my visa application to entertain me.  I mean that was enough, I will post some pics tomorrow of the final product, but you would think I would be using the opportunity to work on my fitness.  But I am in this funk where I absolutely hate the gym and it's become too hot/humid to run outside.  I also hate my ipod and every single gym song on there.  Ok, I don't hate the ipod, but the running jams.  (btw you know what I hate and maybe some can relate?  When the total jam comes out and I put it on running mix and then the song is ruined because when I hear it, I associate it with pain and misery! The worst!  For this reason, I try not to put new jams on running mix.)  Anyway, instead of working out, chunkaaa's been cooking (obvs).  I have made so many new things the past 4 weeks, including 5 kinds of homemade spring rolls.  What I am finding in my spring roll research and experimentation, is that basically anything you enjoy eating, can be made into a spring roll.  So, Al's Casa de Cupcakes y Burritos is out...  Roll it up: Spring Roll Fang Zi is hot for '13 (fang zi is house in chinese :) )  Roll it up will sell only spring rolls - I am thinking it's a truck or some sort.  But the possibilities are endless!  This week I made Italian (aka pizza rolls) and Mexican spring rolls (aka mini burrito).  Also made traditional with pork, with chicken, and vegetarian.  Next I might try the breakfast spring roll -- eggs, bacon, and potatoes! They can be deep fried, baked, or fresh (rice paper wrapper, my personal preference).  Also want to experiment with the dessert spring roll, which might involve some kind of cake.  I know what you're all thinking, this is genius!  Well, dont steal my idea bitches!  I am onto something here :-P

Obvs you know there will be a Darwin NT spring roll with mud crab in it.  Crabbing continues to be action packed.  I was just chillin in the house on Sunday when Jason came home with a major emergency -- there were 3 crabs in the crab pot. I wanted nothing to do with fishing those fuckers out, so Lee went down to help him.  Well, unexpected turn of events in crabbing is that these crabs had fought each other in the cage and one were majorly fucked up!  The biggest, feistiest one we called Monster.  Monster was a beast, MASSIVE claws.  He had beat the shit out of one crab so badly that he had cracked his top shell and caused damage to the bottom body.  The crab ended up dying an hour later, luckily there was a neighbor who was eager to have him for lunch.  And wouldnt you know it, the crab with one claw from last week was back in the game, getting caught in the pot again!  He had also battled with Monster, so we figured just cook him.  That left just Monster with us and he was not fucking around.  We fed him chicken wings to keep him busy but every time someone tried to move him, it was on.  Jason brought Monster to work and sold him to someone, hahaha.  Another business venture!

Also wondering if anyone has made any version of the cauliflower pizza crust that is all over pinterest?  This seems like something I would make, but would come out terrible.  I picture it to be soggy or flimsy. I would need to be able to pass it off as regular crust too because I just don't see this going over well with dudes.  Any recommendations?

Mud crab

You've probably never heard of mud crabs before because I had never until I moved to the NT.  But mud crab is HUGE here.  One crab sells for like 35$.  Anyway, a couple weeks ago, Jason decided that he was going to take up a new hobby of catching these damn crabs.  We went out and bought a "crab pot" which is basically just a trap.  You put some bait in there, crab comes in to get the bait, crab cant get out.  Alternatively, and what happens most of the time, put some bait in there, fish/birds eat the bait, crab never goes in...lol.

Anyway, we didnt have too high of expectations for this.  Or should I say, I didnt have high expectations, Jason is obsessed.  I hate these damn crabs.  First off, they are massive and wicked ugly.  Secondly, these fuckers are fiesty and effing strong!  Their claw can TAKE OFF A FINGER!  No joke.  So obvs I am scared of them.  When they get stressed, they will drop a claw to get away - such as if they attack you.  The claw will stay on you and the crab will drop it and run.  You cant get the claw off!  I am not interested in this...

Michie court is right built near the marina and just across the street are marshes - aka mud crab village.  First day Jason threw the crab pot into the water, BAM he caught this friend!

Only thing is, we didn't know what the fuck to do with him. So we ended up just putting him back.  And we are pretty sure he ended up dying because we saw a pretty big dead crab there the next day.  Sorry little guy.

After that, no crabs for like a week.  Jason was back and forth to the stupid trap 3 times a day and was getting depressed.  Every time the bait was gone and there was no crab.  I talked to a friend of mine here who catches these things and she said to keep the trap on the rocks.  Ever since then, crabs.  On Saturday, Jason went to the trap not "just for fun" not expecting anything and there was a huge crab in there! He comes running home to get his "tools" aka scissors and a cooler and hurries back to crab pot.  20 mins later, he shows up covered in mud and bleeding.  "Is the crab in the cooler?"  I ask.  Nope, just one claw.  After what he calls an "epic battle" the crab dropped its claw and ran away.  LOLOLOL, obvs I laughed but he was less amused.

The next day, bam nother crab!  This time instead of trying to remove the crab from the trap, he just brought the entire trap back to the house (awesome).  This crab was also not coming out of the trap.  After 20 mins of trying to get it out, we dumped ice on him and he "went to sleep."

As you know with shellfish, you have just 2 choices: cook them alive or kill them and then cook them immediately.  We researched online, and the "humane" way to do it is to put the crab in the freezer for 45-60 mins and the crab goes unconscious.  So next thing you know, there is a big ass crab in the freezer.  You don't want to keep it in there too long or it will freeze to death.  Next is the real fun part.  You have to cut the crab in half, rip off the top shell, and clean out all the guts before you can cook it.  Obvs were fighting about who was going to do this.  I was scared shitless the fucker was going to wake up and start attacking me.  Keep in mind, we were too scared to try to bind the claws.  In the end, Jason was the unlucky one who had to cut the crab in half.  I was less terrified after that and we both cleaned him out (talk about gross).

And here is the finished product!  I cooked it "Asian style" (Gangnam style?) and cracked the shells open and cooked in the wok with garlic and chili peppers.  Came out pretty nice, but was a ton of work!  I am hoping no mud crabs come along for a while...  Funniest part is, Jason -- after all that work -- didnt even like it!

And that is my life in Darwin.  Pos next I will catch a croc.  

return of the wet

UGHHHH WET SEASON!  And it's already that time of year again.  The tell tale signs of wet season are here:  my skin is a mess, my hair has dried up (don't know why this happens), I am constantly sweating, and the motherfucking ants are back.  Ants are especially bad in my room!  I can't even keep a bedside water glass because ants are all over that shit.  I feel like it's last year all over again!

Speaking of, less than 2 weeks and it's my one year anniversary down under. Not sure what to make of it. It's been a good but hard year.  It went by pretty fast, but everything seems to be going by fast these days.  A week and a half until I submit the dreaded visa app!  It looks really out of hand now, but I feel like there is more stuff I could have in there!  My favorite is the "evidence of genuine and continuing relationship" requirement. Basically, throw as much shit in there as you can to show you are not making this relationship up.  So lame!  I feel like there can never be enough!  Anyway, I am super nervous.  

While I'm at it!

Might as well take this opportunity to rant about how much I hate facebook!  OMG is every single one of my FB friends having a fucking child?!  Goodness gracious!  I AM SO SICK OF BABY PICTURES!  I dont like babies, I do not care.  50 photos of your new born is not necessary.  The baby looks exactly the same in every pic!  Keep the babies to yourself!

Buzz I'm going through all your private stuff, you better come out and pound me!

First off, I am using the world's worst mini computer, so please excuse any typos in advance.  the keyboard barely works on this POS.  Second, re: entry title, Jason literally shouted 10 mins ago "I am in the laundry room, putting things in the drier and not paying attention!"  Obvs he knew I was going to to tell him to get away and let me handle this.  Now he is passed out.  Just as well, this wee khas been 'military martial arts training.'  He is tiring out now, but earlier in the week was not easy for me!  A lot of "stand there and I am going to attack you."  me, "no."  him, "but baaaaabe, I need to practice."  And then I am attacked. 

So anyways, I know I am blogging less lately, but super stressed out!  So much is going on...  Wednesday is my last day of work, which feels like could not come at a worse time!  As I mentioned, my jobwas not able to sponsor my work visa, so I have to file for a partner visa with jason.  Blah blah due to visa complications, I have to stop working at thisjob for one month (as you can see, the space bar is particularly problematic).  Maybe I could have found another job to sponsor, but I like this job and I want to stay working there.  Therefore, I have to abide by visa rules and take a month's break before I apply for partner visa.  During the month, I have to temp -- 1. because the visa is expensive, and 2. to have more money for xmas USA trip :)  Obvs this is stressful! I have a job that I am really involved in but I CANT work there, and instead of working, having to temp when mind is on current job.  so weird.  In good news, when I return, I am getting promoted (FINGERS CROSSED).  It needs to go through the levels of approval, so we'll see...

Next obvious stress is the VISA.  Dun dun DUUUUUN!  It is just one month from application time.  I will take pics of my visa app soon.  IT'S A BINDER already.  enormous fucking document that basically tells Jason's and my life stories.  Every single thing possible to prove that we are in a "genuine and committed relationship," which mostly means "how do you share your money?"  Do we have joint assets, how do we support each other, who pays what bill, etc etc.  It's super romantic.

Finally,I am absolutely DYING to move!  We are supposed to be moving in Nov, on top of all thisother stuff!  My apt complex is sstill horrific, last weekened drunk assholes threw RAW SAUSAGE LINKS from their 4th floor balcony into the parking lot.  About 3lbs of raw sausages landed on cars and exploded everywhere.  Keep in mind, it's 90 degrees everyday and it was a sunday morning.  some cars didnt move til monday to go to work, BAD SURPRISE.  Additionally, although I dont mention itoften, we still have a roommate.  He's ok, but we are really anxious to live alone.  Oh AND, Jason's dad is coming this weekend from India.  I have never met him before and only seen him on skype once, so should be loads of fun.  jason hasnt seen him in 3 years... he iscoming for 2 days.  wont be awkward at all!

"You are so not from Australia"

I am away for work again this week, but this time I am not out bush.  I am about 250 miles south of Darwin in a town called Katherine.  Katherine has even more backpackers than Darwin, so obvs I dont like it.  Anyway, out bush you normally have to stay in a shared house or something, but here I am in a real hotel.  A coworker of mine was here for just one night last night, so we decided to have dinner in the hotel.  I came home, watched tv etc.  Around 11pm I was getting ready for bed and about to go pee. I walked into the bathroom with the light off and thought, omg it looks like something is on the toilet!  Obvs I thought it was poo or something but when I turned the light on I saw new friend had snuck in!  I spazzed!  I had left my friend over an hour before and she was going straight to bed, so I couldnt call her for help.  I called Jason in Darwin panicking, to which he was like WTF.  "It's harmless, just pick it up and put it outside."  Uhhh, have you met me?! I def am not picking up a frog...

Anyway, I couldnt get this fucker to move, and I had to pee bad.  I contemplated going pee in the shower and locking the frog in the bathroom for the night til  I noticed the big gap under the bathroom door.  No, then I would be freaking out all night that the frog was going to leap on me in my sleep. I was forced to remove the frog myself.  I ended up nudging him with a shoe on the menu in the room.  He was very reluctant to move!  Once I got him onto the menu, I carried him outside and he just chilled there.  He was in the same spot when I checked on him 15 mins later. 

Anyway, my friend stopped by to say goodbye to me today and I was all, "OMG you are not going to believe what happened to me last night!! On my toilet there was a......." Her: "what, frog?"  I said how do you know?!  "Did you pick it up and put it outside?"  Uhhh, kinda....  "You are so not from Australia."  LOL

back in action next week

Everything has been getting in the way of me blogging lately!  Broken computer (3 weeks in the shop), last week out bush,  last weekend camping (yes, CAMPING), etc etc.  I am away again next week for work, but this time I will be taking personal laptop with me so I can blog!  Expect to hear my thoughts on life next week :-P

wo ai ni

A week and a half back from Malaysia and things are finally starting to feel normal again.  Had a pretty low key weekend, which included my first cricket match.  The cricket is not usually in Darwin, but they have kind of a spring training up here since it's still winter other places.  Damn, if you think baseball is boring, wait til you see the cricket.  Worst of all, they were only selling "light beer."  Not sure if I have explained Australian light beer before, but it means light in alcohol, like 3%.  What's the point??  They have light, mid (maybe 4%), and regular beer here.  Stupidest shit ever.  I dont want to bother drinking beer and all it's calories if I am not going to feel buzzed!  Needless to say, we didnt stay at the cricket too long, but it was good to see. 

Chinese is also back on.  Same peeps in the class except all the younger peeps dropped.  So it's like me and the retirees, including the annoying ones that are always coming in with their Chinese tea and shit.  Bitch, it's not show and tell up in here!  I have to admit, I didnt study much during the break.  I feel like I have never seen those characters before.  The talking is coming back to me, but learning the characters is so hard.  I am still trying to remember the numbers, sigh. 

Visa drama continues!  Looks like I will end up having to quit my job for one month.  I guess that is not so bad.  Like I said before, I am really trying to do everything possible to keep this job.  It is so chill, but also enjoyable -- I like the people and the work.  I am supposed to go back out bush last week of August, this time for 4 days.  Different court this time, and apparently this place is nicer than the place I went last time.  "Nicer," not to be confused with "nice." 

Diet is back on as well.  I lost all the weight I gained on vacation, so still working on trying to lose a little more.  I have been running, but I think it's better to run in the mornings than in the afternoons.  Unfortunately, I start work at 8, so that means 6am leave for the gym.  BLAH.

quick diet update

I am back from Malaysia.  Great time, but super exhausted now.  Anyway, just a quick update that I successfully gained 7 lbs over 9 days despite a very active trip.  A word of advice, the crash diet / cleanse was a terrible idea!  The first couple days, I think my body went into shock! After having absolutely nothing bad for you for weeks, I immediately started drinking and eating like a chunkaaa once we got there.  I was so sick!  LOL, so save the cleanse for AFTER your trips!  Another Alkins lesson learned ;-)

Visa saga cont'd

It has been a super stressful week!  First off, of course, is the mother fucking visa.  Seriously, why do bitches want to make my life so hard?  On Friday we had a meeting.  It was head of my dept, operations manager, my boss, the head of HR, and a person from immigration.  The immigration officer walks us all step by step through the process, seems super easy, and then I walk her out.  After I left, the other peeps stayed to discuss.  They call me, I think everything is sorted now.  NOT THE CASE!  HR woman busts out NOW, after a month of this, that there is an internal policy that visa sponsorship is for senior management only.  WTFF??!  Apparently she didnt realize I wasnt senior management.  So now they want me to find a recruitment agency who will technically be my employer, but continue to work there.  So we'll see if that can happen...

Jason came home this week. I think it's interesting how guys act when they are used to being with all dudes all the time.  All dudes out in the bush for 3 months.  I was like, can you please start acting normal again now?

The diet has plateaued.  I gained 1 lb back since Jason came home, which is not so bad.  Havent lost any more, but the crash diet had to stop.  Cant exactly serve celery sticks for dinner!  Also had my hair done last week.  It's super expensive in Darwin, so I wanted it to be just a little lighter so I dont have to get it done all the time.  However, the stylist made it super blonde and didnt put a toner in it.  It's dry as shit too.  I called and asked them to fix the brassiness and they said they would charge me!  So instead I spent a whole bunch on products to fix it myself.  But it's starting to look ok now. lol.

Just 2 more days until we leave to Malaysia.  I can't wait.  The stress has been killing me lately and I think getting away for a little bit is exactly what I need.  

Uhhh, what??

Update on the diet.  I just weighed myself.  I lost 5.5 lbs this week.  LOLOLOLOL!  My goal is just 10 lbs!  Idk why this stupid diet is working, but it's a very noticeable difference in my stomach.  One of the biggest changes I made is I always want to snack at work, and I will munch on things like granola bars or rice cakes.  I have replaced those with carrots and celery sticks.  So whenever I just feel like eating something, but I am not actually hungry, I crunch on those.  Also, changed to black coffee, which I actually dont mind.  I always drank black in Korea because it was so gross there was no point in adding milk or sugar, would still be gross. I think these are changes I can actually keep up!  Things I cant keep up are no meats/tofu/cheese, no bread/pasta, and I eliminated booze (yes, WINE) completely.  We know that's not going to last long, lol.  The no cheese was prolly 2 lbs itself.  I also have been really pushing myself in my run, increasing the length of time and frequency of sprints.  Which again is something I can keep up.

Typically I have been eating a smoothie for breakfast with a half banana, small bunch of blueberries, almond milk, fat free greek yogurt, teaspoon of almond butter, and vanilla extract.  Shit is delicious!  I pound it.  Then I will have another piece of fruit, like an orange.  I have something light for lunch, like a tomato avocado wrap on a fat free wrap (which is technically bread, so I am eating a little bread) and maybe an oat bar thing.  Then I snack on the carrots all day.  Dinner is salad with hard boiled eggs or something.  Snack is some nuts.  Not too hard, but def not satisfying.  Will keep posted.  

My shows!

I lost one pound today!  HAHA!  Will prolly wake up tomorrow and have gained 2 lbs!  That seems to be the way it goes.  Esp since there was chocolate bailey's cake with fudge frosting at work today.  Uhh what?  Everyone brings in a cake on their birthday in this office.  Everyone does it!  It's my birthday so I brought cake for everyone.  Not complaining, although chunkaaa could only take a couple bites.  Also, there were PUPPIES in the office today.  2 actual real life 11 week old puppies came for a visit.  So it was a good day.  

I realized today that I am majorly dreading my roommate coming back.  I think I would rather stay living alone!  I will tell you what the problem is.  The main problem.  THE TV!  I have no life, so I have my shows now.  What am I going to do when he is here and wants to watch tv???  I have shows every night!  I cant say, oh it's Tuesday and I watch Master Chef, and it's Wednesday and I watch Episodes, and now it's Thursday...  Dilemmas, dilemmas... but really, how do I tackle this issue?

Finkle and Einhorn

Diet and visa, visa and diet.  This is pretty much what's going on with me.  I SUCK at the diet.  You should see me creepin around looking for snacks.  Unfort I am coming up empty handed.  I am always hungry!  You know how they say things like hard boiled eggs make you full... not the case!  hahahaha.  Today I weighed .1 kilos more than yesterday, lol.  So whatever that is in lbs, like a 1/4 lb.  I want immediate results!

Visa saga at work continues. Pos it is getting all resolved tomorrow.  I feel like I should just quit my job and go work for the dept of immigration because I am prolly knowledgeable enough at this point.  Everyone person I call directs me to another person!  Oh, have you talked to so in so in the other fucking dept yet?  Uhh, no, but I would love to!  LOL.  This is the last time I am changing countries!!

So Jason may be coming home a week earlier than expected, which is not necessarily good news.  Right now they are saying he cant take time off in August, which would mean no Malaysia trip for him.  Fuckin figures, right?  I already bought the ticket!  Hopefully that changes.

In very good news, my tomato plant has 16 TOMATOES on it right now!  Not cherry tomatoes, but actual tomatoes!  I am in a state of total shock! I am trying not to jinx it, but if I actually get all those tomatoes I will die.  In heaven!

That is it!  bored bored bored.

Diet

Ughh, this stupid diet blows already and I havent even officially started yet.  I am starving!  I have already decided that the raw thing is not gonna work, not even for the week.  Sticking with the veggies, but I will cook the dinner.  So basically, no meat, fish, cheese, carbs not from fruits/veggies, tofu, or sugar.  Fuckin a, how bad does that sound??  Yeah, I know it's a dumb diet and it really doesnt even make sense, but whatevs.  I am doing it for 3 weeks, lol.  Maybe I will lose 20 lbs and this will be a new craze!  Cant turn out worse than the Alkins!  

Muffins bitches!

I made muffins last weekend because I was bored.  They are the whole foods vita top muffin.  They have no sugar, flour, butter, egg yolks, etc.  I obvs thought this shit was going to be disgusting.  I have never had good luck healthy baking.  But they are DELICIOUS!  Also super easy to make...  you chuck everything in the blender and then bake it.  That's it.  About 115 calories each for 12 muffins.  The only problem is eating just one!  

http://dashingdish.com/recipe/triple-chocolate-chunk-muffins/

I took some pics:

I survived!

So I survived my first trip out bush.  Safe to say, there are few places like an Aboriginal "bush camp" in the US.  The dogs were obvs everywhere and biting.  They also chase the cars and rip off things like mud flaps.  Because of this, nearly every dog is walking with at least one bad leg because peeps just run them over all the time.  You dont really have a choice.  If it looks like a dog is getting ready to bite you, you hit it with something.  Hard.

I was there to observe the court.  The entire situation is just fucked up.  A couple days before, the police go around and remind everyone that court is happening and you need to come into "town."  You might be thinking, as was I, wtf is "town" in a camp??  Well, the camp has "houses." Idk how to describe the houses, a lot are trailers, but some are more like units than homes.  It's a house that was plopped down, it could blow away.  But for many people, it's much better than what they had -- which before 2 years ago was tents.  Legit, you and  your family lived in a tent.  Anyway, I am getting off track.  So come into town means all the people that are camped around the community -- way out in the bush -- have to come in to this area where they have houses for court.  "Court" is obvs not held in a court room, but in a spare room next to the post office.  You name, they don't have it.  In fact, stacks of printer paper boxes are being used as tables in the court room.  The lawyers font have anywhere to work, so they operate out of suitcases and one white fold up table outside the courtroom.  Keep in mind that we have wet season here where there are constant monsoons.  Cant wait til they send me out to court in the wet.

Anyway, court here is a shit show.  Most people are being arrested for things such as assault, driving unlicensed, possession of cannabis, etc.  Also lots of domestic violence.  You gotta kind of wonder, when you are living hundreds of miles from any other communities, who really cares if you dont have a license or you are smoking cannabis?  But thats the law and if you break it you are brought to this fucked up court.  I dont want to get into too much of the rest, but just imagine total chaos of people who don't really speak English being brought into court all day and then trying to grasp their punishment.  UGHH.

I was happy to get home, but I know this is just the beginning for me going out bush.  Honestly, I feel slightly inspired by the situation and maybe it's a problem I can help tackle.  Already I have been asked to write a formal report on my observations, which I did, but I am reluctant to share it.  I feel like that white person who sits in an office all day and then comes out with my "recommendations."  I dont want to be that person.  Perhaps after a few more times, I will feel more comfortable sharing my thoughts.

Enough about that, back to stupid shit!  Since I am a chunkaaa and I am bored, I have decided to start a new fad diet which will likely commence Sunday or Monday (whenever I finish eating all the chicken I cooked today, lol).  I semi-considered revisiting the master cleanse, but then I read reviews of people who did it, and it brought back bad memories.  So now I am going to try a raw diet this week.  LOL, it's already funny.  No cooked food at all.  Well, maybe hard boiled eggs for a little protein.  I am going to start with 5 days and see what happens.  Carrot sticks, celery, broccoli, etc etc.  I can make it 5 days, some people eat like this all the time!  Uhhh, wine is raw... right??  

Bread day 2

I had the bread with eggs this morning.  Still delicious but I found it got denser and is not as high.  I think next time I am going to cook it 5 mins longer.  I am still baffled by this bread!

Today is "Territory Day," ie the only day of the year you can both buy and shoot off fireworks.  Of course all dudes love this day -- Jason is so mad he is missing it, started bitching about it 2 months ago.  It's really weird because all of a sudden they are selling fireworks EVERYWHERE.  But you have to both buy them and set them off only on this one day.  I def slept in today because I am just picturing how loud it's going to be around the Michie Ct tonight!

So everyone is my office is laughing at me.  They are sending me to court in a small community this week.  They waited a little while for me to get used to the job, but I think this is going to start happening more often.  Australia is super rural and people live out in communities that literally dont have roads, they are accessible by plane or 4WD only.  Basically, they hold court once a month in each community -- all the court staff, judges, lawyers all fly in for 2-3 days and everyone that has been arrested in the last month gets a summons to appear in court that day.  And most of these people don't speak English, they speak Aboriginal languages (I work with the court interpreting).  You can imagine how chaotic this is.  And weird!  The communities are all aboriginal people and once a month all these white people fly in and put them in jail.  It's going to be a super interesting experience and it's going to places that most Australian people never even get to see.

I have to take this small ass charter plane and roll in there for Wed and Thurs of this week.  Everyone thinks this is funny.  One because I am American and 2. because I am me.  They are calling it by introduction to the true Territory.  I have been advised by many people to carry a stick with me because there are these mangy dogs everywhere that bite you. They call them "camp dogs."  Apparently the place I am going is the worst for camp dogs.  I asked if I should bring mace and someone said that's a good idea.  Fuckin A!  I am obvs terrified of these dogs.  My boss was saying one time he was there and one of the dogs had crawled under the court house and died 2 days earlier.  The place stunk and no one removed the dog!  I seriously think I have a knack for picking the world's craziest jobs.  I will be sure to write a full report next weekend, if I survive. "You're not a true Territorian til you've been bitten by a camp dog, Al." Ahhhhh!  

I made bread!!

I was very skeptical of this recipe.  I've never made real bread before.  I've made naan and cake breads, like pumpkin or banana etc, but not a real bread.  The reason I've never tried is because bread's such a bitch to make, kneading etc.  But this recipe said no kneading -- and basically no work at all.   So I figured if it goes wrong, whatev.  Didnt really cost me anything.  The only catch is you have to let the dough rise for 12-18 hours, but the recipe says more towards the 18 side.  


Here's the original recipe posted in NY Times by Mark Bittman, but it was actually invented by an NY baker named Jim Lahey -- who is now my hero.  I can't believe it took me 6 years to discover this!  Thank you Pinterest!!
http://www.nytimes.com/2006/11/08/dining/08mini.html?_r=2&pagewanted=all

I changed the recipe slightly just based on what I had in the house.  I used bread flour instead of all purpose flour (which we actually dont have in Aus).  And I used a whole teaspoon of yeast because that's how much is in one packet.  Oh, and I only let it rise 30 mins after re-flouring the dough.  Now the problem is chunkaaa wants to eat all the bread!

Here's the step by step instructions someone added to their blog:
http://www.kitchentrials.com/2012/04/03/crusty-rustic-no-knead-bread-aka-the-easiest-bread-youll-ever-make/

 Fresh out of the oven.  Yes, it's baked in a dutch oven -- you actually bake the oven for 30 mins before putting the bread in so it's nice and hot.  It's a normal size bread, that dutch oven is just massive.  

Just resting.  How beautiful does it look??  The most surprising thing is how hard and crunchy the outside came out and how soft and airy it is inside.  

I am having a really hard time letting it cool before tearing into it!

This is the bottom, nice color!

Sliced!  Look at that airiness!  

And with lots of butter.  Notice there is one slice missing at this point.  I couldn't wait to eat it!!

ANYONE can make this bread!  I am just picturing it with an antipasto platter, olive oil, cheese, mmmmm.  And I have the world's worst oven, and it still came out great.  Make the bread!

WEHHHHHH

I have decided I am not done bitching!  Making matters worse in this visa situation is I just feel completely alone in it.  I can't talk to Jason about it because I cant talk to Jason at all for another month -- by that time I need to have all this sorted out.  I can't really talk to my mom about it because she doesnt understand visas.  And I have no friends.  There is no one to help me!!!  And it's especially hard to stay positive being alone all the time without a constant reminder that this is all worth it.  But it is all worth it...and I can handle it.  I am not a pussy!  

My new visa: the saga. Chapter 1.

There is no more stressful situation in my life right now than my new visa.  Actually, I shouldn't say new visa, because I have been stressed about visas since I decided to move here last year.  They don't make it easy to live in other countries.  Well, living in another country is not so hard, have working rights is.  

So everyone prolly remembers my initial job search when I got here and then they strange coincidental timing of having 3 job offers all at once.  I ultimately chose the job which paid the least, but I thought had the most potential.  Truth is I am doing really well at my job and I have learned so much there.  It's almost hard to believe how much I have learned in the past 3 months.  I think I fit in well and I know if I stay with the gov in the future, I can be successful.  

Anyway, I am on this dumb backpacker visa where you can only work at each job for 6 months.  My 6 months will be up in Sept and my visa expires in Oct. I have 2 potential visa options.  Option one is I apply for a spousal visa.  I have to have lived with Jason for 12 months consecutively (to the day) to be eligible for this visa-- essentially it's like a green card.  I have to submit extensive, extensive paperwork, FBI issued background checks from every country I have lived in the past 10 years (so that's US, Korea, and Australia), and another medical check at my own expense (because the one I got last year expires within 12 months of getting it).  Also, I have to pay $3000 just to apply in addition to the costs of the background and medical checks.  All together, about $4000.  BUT that's not even the worse part.  I can't apply until I have lived with Jason for the entire 12 months -- meaning I have to go into immigration on the day I am supposed to leave the country and submit my application.  Talk about stressful.  Second, this visa takes 4-eva to process, potentially up to a year.  During that time, I cannot leave the country.  Meaning, I wont be able to come home this xmas as planned or anytime during the next year. That, to me, is the absolute worst scenario.  

On the other hand, I can get a business sponsored visa -- paid for by my employer (super cheap too, like $400), no medical check required, etc.  Use the same paperwork I submitted for current visa, takes 2 months to get, easy peasy.  I spoke to my boss about it and he said of course.  Boss spoke to big boss and she said absolutely.  Big boss spoke to department HR and they said no way.  Apparently they are worried about what kind of message it sends if a gov dept has overseas workers taking jobs away from Australians.  Which, OBVS, makes no sense because I ALREADY HAVE THE JOB!  I have taken the job away from an Australian.  So basically they are saying you can continue to work here, but have to sort out the visa on your own.  But these are peeps that have never met me, in another building across town, making ridiculous decisions that are fucking up my life.  Luckily my office is 100% on my side, so I am ready to play some hardball, lol.  But seriously, I feel I should be supported in this and if they want me to continue to work there, they should help me out.  Yes, I am starting to rant, but if I said I was stressed it's the understatement of the year!  Monday, I will have another convo, so will keep posted on how that goes.  UGHH

Just when you think things cant get any worse...

Magic Mike doesnt open in Aus for a whole nother month!!  They havent even started advertising it yet.  UGHH, I watched the trailer a while back and knew the release date was July 26th here, but didn't realize it was opening tomorrow in the US.  FML I want to go home!! NOT FAIR!!  

There is a murder suspect on the loose in Darwin.  Obvs I am scared!  This dude is wanted for a murder in New South Wales 5 days ago.  They found a headless body with a hat where the head should be.  They still havent found the head!!  I guess they found the guy's car abandoned about 30 miles from here.  Ok, just typing that is freaking me out.

Not much is happening with me lately.  My job is driving me kind of crazy, but that's normal.  We had an all staff meeting yesterday where they announced budget cuts and change of positions, one of which was my position.  That was a surprise to me.  Unfortunately it turns out that 'increased responsibilities' does not mean increased pay.  I will die broke.

That is it.  Overall very boring week so far.  

And now pics of Darwin

Here's some shots I took around town today.  I don't want to hear comments that it looks pretty here because this place obvs ______________s.

Darwin Harbor, home of the most massive jelly fish I have ever seen.  Unfortunately, there weren't any today. 

A little further down the pier.  

This is the waterfront.  On the right in the convention center, in the middle is the hotel I stayed at for a week when I first got here.  In front of the hotel is the wave pool, lol...One of the major tourist attractions!

Mitchell St, where all the bars are. 

This is the park where I eat lunch everyday. 

And this is my view.  Too bad you can't swim here!  But it is a great place to eat lunch and relax.

One of the hotels along the water.  

This is the Smith St. Mall...I think they are trying to make it like a 3rd Street Promenade or Quincy Market.  Problem is all the stores here blow.  

This is my work on a Sunday!  

Crocosaurus Cove downtown.  "Crocs in the city!"

It's 3pm on a Sunday and all the bars are packed. 

Pics as promised

These are pics of my neighborhood, Bayview :-)  It's a very nice place to live among the millionaires!  Now if only there were no douches or midgees...

Welcome to Bayview :-)

Those apartments are the Michie Court!!

This is the running path.  Bayview is a circle.  Start at Michie Court and then I run down 

this path for half a mile.  

The marina is in the middle of all the houses.   I run the path then take 2 little bridges and end up here.  

Here's a shot of the marina without the sunset, a little further down the circle.  

Typical massive Bayview homes.  Everyone pulls their boat right up to their house.  

Sigh, how the other half lives...lol

Now turning back towards my place.  Idk if you can make it out, but this hill over looks the Darwin harbor.  

And right back near home, the start of the marina at sunset.  

Just cause, here is my balcony with some of my plants.  My mom says I look like an old Polish woman, whatever that means.  I think she is referring to the number of pots with struggling plants...

Baking Soda!!

I'm obsessed.  I saw on damn Pinterest that you can wash your face with just a paste made of baking soda and water.  Obvs I tried it tonight and now I am officially obsessed with baking soda!  My skin feels awesome!  I washed with the paste, left it on only a minute and then followed it up with a moisturizing mask.  However, my research has shown me you can leave it on overnight!  I read tons of reviews because I was nervous and the only negative I found was that it dries your skin, so make sure to moisturize.  I love baking soda!

There are tons of other uses for the BS.  I found this article very interesting:  http://voices.yahoo.com/25-amazing-uses-baking-soda-youve-never-thought-11585.html  


Try it, it's great :)

Quinoa

Over the course of time I have finally eaten a one pound bag of quinoa.  I tried to REALLY hard to like it, but truth is quinoa blows.  It's so bland!  Today I made baked quinoa with broccoli and cheese.  Obvs I want it to be mac and cheese but instead it's quinoa and low fat cheese made with skim milk and no butter.  Not delicious.  I found this shit on Pinterest.  I clicked on the link to see the recipe and reviews.  Lots of people say they love this, but much how mashed cauliflower tastes nothing like mashed potatoes, quinoa and "cheese" is nothing like velveeta shells and cheese :-(  People who say it's delicious are lying to themselves.  

Back to Pinterest, it irritates me that when you look at the women's apparel section, all the bitches on there are so skinny.  Then you look at the food, and so much chunkaaa food!  I am an emotional mess!  LOL  but seriously, neon and bright colored skinny pants are all the rage right now.  My question is how skinny do you need to be to wear these? Soooo tight and soooo bright, if you are bigger than a size 2, can you rock this look?  I tried on some burnt orange cropped pants today, not even that bright.  From the front they looked ok and then I saw my butt!  Not a good situation!  I saw some posted on Pinterest and bitches that wear this shit have legs that are small as arms.  Can I rock the bright pants or do I leave that to the supermodels?  

Oh the shame!

Guess what I JUST did?  I bought a Nicki Minaj song on itunes...  I AM the problem!  But ughh, that Pound the Alarm song is so good for running.  I am not admitting it's good, it's just so upbeat!  Don't judge me, I will still continue to hate on her!

SPEAKING OF HATING, I finished "50 Shades" this week.  Only took me 6 weeks.  I was telling my mom about how much I hated it, to which mom replied, "Alexandra, I don't have to read that book to know that it sucks."  Mom is so wise.  Still, I am happy I read it just so that I am not in the dark.  Happy to have read it, sorry that I paid money for it.  I read Eat, Pray, Love for the same reasons, but managed to get that one from the library.  The worst is people on my facebook who say things like, "Trust me your husband is going to thank you for reading it" and then I cant help but think of what that means and the mental pictures that follow!  WHY?!

So Jason has been gone again for 2 weeks now.  I hate to be one of those girls who whine about missing their boyfriend, but c'mon this is ridic.  Gone 2 weeks and still another 6 to go (on top of the 2 months he was already gone for).  What makes it less bearable is that we cant even talk on the phone...  no phone, no email, no communication at all.  And since he is still the only person I know here aside from work peeps, it especially blows.

Good things are work is busy, so the days go by quickly.   Looks like things are only going to get busier in the future.  Most days I enjoy my job, although there are of course those days when I want to die.  As I have mentioned before, as busy as things are, you're never expected to work overtime.  I am out of work before 430 and I love it.  So we'll see how things go there in the future, but I am thankful to have this job while I am in Darwin.

And most importantly, I have a VACATION coming up!!  YESSS, the DAY Jason is back, we are going to Malaysia to RELAX with good friends Scott and Brandon.  It has been wayyyy too long since I have seen all 3 of them and I couldnt be more excited for this trip!  :)

crock pot?

Soooooo, I really, really like the idea of a slow cooker.  I have one, but it is soooo rarely used.  I make pork in it for carnitas, which comes out nice.  I made chili once and that sucked.  I also will make beans on occasion.  Beans with chopped veggies is prolly the thing I make best in it.  I like throwing a bunch of shit in the pot and not having to do a damn thing until I eat it 12 hours later. The problem is, whenever I search for crockpot recipes, they almost always include a can of cream soup or sour cream or some other foul ingredient I would rather die than eat.  C'mon, how white trash is canned cream soup?  Who knows what they put in that shit!!  Well, my point is, if you have good slow cooker recipes that do not contain cream in any form, please send them my way!

I am still reading 50 Shades of Grey.  I hate it so much I go out of my way to avoid it.  But I am determined to finish.  I am now at the point where Christina (typo, but it stays) confesses something like "the woman who birthed me was a crack addict, Anastasia!!"  WHOA the drama.  As if you couldnt see that coming.  These 2 suck so bad.  This book blows.  "I will teach him, I am not going to ask for my panties back!"  The defiance!  Ughh, why did I buy this book?  Even the people at the book store told me it was good!  The chick that sold it told me to sit back with the air conditioning on and enjoy!  She also said I would be back in 3 days for the 2nd book.  I should go back and tell her off.  I'm pissed!

Next week I am going to go around downtown Darwin on my lunch break taking some pics.  I think peeps have the wrong idea of how Darwin looks.  Yesterday I attended a conference session at the one of the hotels on the waterfront.  A coworker of mine said, "It feels like Miami down here."  I laughed out loud --- not quite Miami :-)

Ni hao ma?

Did facebook just become even more stalker-ish, or I did I click something weird, because I now see EVERYTHING you do!  Every time someone likes a status or a photo, writes on someone's wall, etc, it's in my newsfeed -- not just the ticker, the newsfeed!  I dont want to see this shit!  So now it's like annoying pics and statuses x100.  If I didnt live abroad, I would delete my account.  But I already feel like I have lost touch  with so many people, I keep it just so I dont feel so out of the loop.

I am watching America's Hardest Prisons right now.  They must mean all the Americas because this prison is in Mexico.  Omg, you do not want to go to jail in Mexico!  There is one American dude in there who had to have his leg amputated.  Idk what the deal is, but dude has a prosthetic leg that is held together with duct tape and a string he holds in his hand when he walks.  So when he walks, he picks up the leg with this string. Not like some medical device, the string is part of the duct tape...it might be a long piece of tape even.  Dude is fucked too, he is serving a 22 year sentence.

So terrible news of the day is Chinese level one ends next week!  I assumed I would continue right into level 2, but there is a break in between.  A 6 week break!!  So after next week, no Mandarin class til August!!!!  WHAT AM I GOING TO DO WITH MY TIME?!  I look forward to class every week and I study during my lunch breaks. What do I do now?!?!  Dont they realize I have no life and I dont need a break?!?!  WHAT DO I DO NOW????

Speaking of the word 'realize,' I now type words like that wrong all the time.  When I say wrong, I mean I am in the habit of using the Australian English spelling now...  'realise.'  I automatically type it like that now and have to correct myself when not at work.  Realise, familiarise, organise, colour, neighbourhood, favourite...  GRRRRR.  And the other day I asked someone if they had acclimated to the weather and they said, "Dont you mean acclimatise?"  Huh?

Facebook rant of the day!

How could I forget?!  Seriously, I want to punch everyone on facebook (and pinterest) who says NOM NOM NOM or OM NOM NOM!!  What is with this phrase?!?!  All I ever see is some version of nom nom.  You are not cookie monster!

I know it's that time of year and I am at that unfortunate age, but if it wasnt for pics of weddings, kids, and food (with nom nom captions), my newsfeed would be empty.  The wedding pics are nice, but I hate kids and I am tired of looking at kid pics.  I didnt sign up for this!  Save those kid pics for emails.  Or the xmas card.

Ok, back to watching "Embarrassing Bodies."  

I AM BORED!!!

OMG I am so bored and I am watching the Voice Australia and I dont think it can get much worse than this... overall.  Obvs I have chosen to drink wine to put myself out of my misery, but unfortunately it's 9pm and I am not even close to tired.  Damn you long weekend with nothing to do!  I got too much sleep!

So I have never seen The Voice in America, but I imagine it has to be better than the Aussie version.  This shit is bad!  (Side note -- commercials are on...does Subway in US have a Moroccan lamb sub now?  That shit looks fundamentally not right).  The judges are Seal, Joel Madden, Delta Goodrem, and Keith Urban.  Seal is the most ridiculous -- he changes his nail polish every week, currently gold sparkly.  He usually has his shirt unbuttoned to his belly button but this week has thrown a major curve ball and is wearing a turtleneck!  Who would have thought?! It makes it even weirder that I think Joel is def in love with Seal.  The chick on right now is singing Hallelujah and I am legit scared.  Anyway, enough about that.

So today was an action packed day, as uge.  (Omg Seal is now crying because of the Hallelujah performance.)  Woke up this morning, had some coffee then had to tend to my plants.  See, I might be the world's WORST gardener.  My mom says it's because I try too hard.  All the plants were unhappy.  First, I have 4 hanging baskets with pink impatiens.  I bought the baskets and planted the impatiens myself.  Easy enough to grow, right?  Well they were off to a good start and then 3 of the baskets started looking like shit.  One was taken over by ants, another just died, and another had something eating the leaves.  So I pulled apart all the baskets and planted some seeds in them.  Idk why I did that as I never successfully grow seeds, but we'll see.  Next I had to tackle my tomato issue.  I bought a cherry tomato plant in January, not realizing that they wont pollinate in the humidity of the wet season.  Without getting a single tomato, I ended up with an enormous leggy plant.  It's probably 10 feet long.  I FINALLY started getting tomatoes this week though!  I was going to get rid of the plant, but I felt like it was unfair to the plant to get rid of it when it was just starting to produce tomatoes.  So as I was replanting it in a new container, I broke the stem and now RIP cherry tomato.  I still planted it but have no idea if it will grow.  THEN some massive fucking bird has eaten all my peppers, the only thing that was actually growing so I had to protect the pepper plant from terrorist bird.  I also planted chives for the 3rd time which I hope will work.  How am I this bad at gardening?!  I have had a garden every year for the last 10 years and it is always bad!

After that was all sorted I went shopping and to the movie rental store (they know me there).  I discovered today that they dont have the Last Samurai so idk how I am going to complete my Tom Cruise collection!!  I got Valkyrie and I might have to stop there!  Yeah, major problems.  Came home and cleaned my house, had to make it look like Al's place again as boys disrupted my feng shui.

The best part of my day was my run!  I have started running outside again these past few days and I am so pleased with how much I am enjoying the dry season runs.  It's still too hot for daytime, but sunset is absolutely perfect.  I live on a marina, there is a cool breeze at night, and the sun sets over the water.  I just have to make sure I run fast enough to avoid the midgees (those mini mosquitoes I bitched about before).  Running is great though and I enjoy it even more knowing how much I hated the same run in the wet season.

Other than those exciting events, I am incredibly bored and lonely.  I STILL HAVE NO FRIENDS!  I am over friends, I am like the 40 year old virgin now with a million hobbies.

back in biz

I am back, I apologize for the 3 week hiatus.  Lots to discuss.

First off, thanks to all who showed their concern about my new hair cut.  I went to a place someone from my work recommended.  Haircuts, like everything else in Darwin, are super expensive.  I am talking upwards of 100$  --  and Darwin is not exactly LA.  You're not paying 100$ because you're getting a great trendy cut, you're paying 100$ because they can charge what they want.  This place said 75$ with blow dry or 50$ no blow dry. Considering I was going home to clean my house after, I went with the 50$ option.  The chick from work did not recommend a particular stylist, so I just got whoever they gave me.  I will admit, I almost left when I saw the girl!  She was wearing an absolutely ridiculous sequin outfit, tons of make up, and had bad hair!  I thought, I am so screwed right now.  Thankfully, I had taken a picture with me and she was very concerned about sticking exactly to the picture.  In the end, all was good and I left happy!  Since it is so hot here, hair grows so fast, I am almost ready for another cut.

Jason ended up being able to stay home for 2 whole weeks!  Little bit longer than we had thought, which was great.  But he is gone now and I am sad :-(  He is not coming back til the last week of JULY!  Anyway, we had a great time while he was here despite a few minor setbacks.  We had planned to go down to Katherine, about 220 miles south of Darwin, to go kayaking in one of the national parks there.  It is supposed to be really beautiful, but you can only go during dry season.  We both took last Friday and Monday off work and the plan was to head down early Friday.  Jason called ahead to book the kayaks and turns out the park is closed because of salt water crocs on the loose.  UGHH!!  Obvs we didnt anticipate this happening and didnt have a back up plan, so we decided to just stay in Darwin and head to the classic Darwin golf.  Turns out BOTH Darwin courses were closed!  Terrible luck.  We ended up going BOWLING at noon on a friday, LOL.  We were the only bowlers.  Then we went to the beach for a little bit to relax, but obvs no swimming as it's not safe to swim here.

Next plan was since we can't go to Katherine Gorge, let's go to Kakadu National Park. Kakadu is enormous, hundreds of miles.  However, most of it is only accessible by 4 wheel drive and some places only by air.  Obvs the fiesta is not 4 wheel drive.  Our plan was to rent a 4WD vehicle for the day, until we went to the rental place and they said a ONE DAY rental would be $400 PLUS GAS!!  I wont pay that based on principle!  hahaha.  So we ended up rolling to Kakadu in the Fiesta, which was still a great time.  We had wanted to go swimming, but the swimming holes are all off road, so we climbed rocks all day and hiked through the bush.  Lots of ancient Aboriginal art paintings on the rocks there, and the scenery is amazing.

Dry season weather is awesome.  Same same everyday.  80 during the day, 60 at night.  The most hilarious thing is, people are dressing for winter!  Especially in the morning.  Scarves, jackets, boots, etc.  Darwin will always be a very interesting place to me!

Mandarin is going well.  I study all the time.  Learning the words is not so bad, but learning the characters is a BITCH!  Shit is so hard.  I really want to stick with learning it though.  I am almost at the end of level one. There are 2 more levels after this and then I will have to find another place to learn.  One thing about my class is it is moving a little slow for me.  It is an adult learning class, so geared to people who are busy with work, kids, schedules, etc.  Not for people like me who are anything but busy and study everyday just to have something to do!

For any peeps that missed it, I FINALLY posted some pics on FB.  With the slow internet connection it took absolutely forever, which is why I dont post regularly.  But the pics are a smorgasbord of shit since my trip in Dec.  Enjoy, time for CSI Miami (it's Saturday night!).

new hair cut today!

Yesssah!  I am posting before I go...but I am nervous as hell.  My last Aussie hair cut made me cry when I caught my reflection in a mirror in Target...  literally tears.  This could be even worse as it's my first Darwin hair cut and I need them to fix the disaster that happened before.  I had (correction still HAVE) layers so short in the back it looks like my bangs go all around my head.  WTF?!  So I am cutting it short in an attempt to even out this mess!  I am hoping to say goodbye Mrs Brady and hello to a Nicole Richie style.  Nervous!

something good!

Brace yourself...   I am about to say something positive about Darwin.  The dry season is very nice!!  "Winter" here is like a southern California summer!  It is nice everyday.  Sky is blue, not raining, no humidity, slight breeze, still hot during the day, but not unbearable.  Best of all, I can take my lunch down to the harbor and eat outside now.  I bring my book (still 50 shades of grey barf...def not continuing this series and only still reading bc it was $19) or much better, my Mandarin, and chill out for an hour.  Loving it!

I made a new years resolution to myself today (pos we will call it almost half way through the year resolution).  I am going to stop being so ugly.  I took the first step today and scheduled a hair cut for Saturday.  After the hair cut, I am going to wake up 15 mins earlier each day to actually style my hair in the mornings.  Maaaaaybe I will start wearing make up to work, but probs not. Make up is so expensive here (talking $20+ for Maybelline), I dont want to waste it for work!  But just the hair will help -- not a total betty, but a vast improvement.  Maybe I can even get it colored some time soon!  Anyway, thats as far as the plan goes.  Beauty is costly and I am on a budget!  And I am hungry.

I dont like today

UGHH -- just the day I fork out the dough for that fucking electric bill, student loans get deducted from account...WHAMMY!  And I get paid on Thursdays, but not this Thursday.  BLAH.  Do not like.  I have been at this job for almost 2 months now -- appropriate time to ask for a raise?

You might be wondering how my mandarin lessons are going!  I know this is weighing on everyone's minds.  Well, so so, I would say.  For each word we learn, we learn the spelling with regular letters (pinyin) then we learn the character.  It's almost like each word is a picture.  You know the character, or you don't.  You can't sound it out.  It is mucho loco.  And when I study my flashcards, they have my handwriting of the character, which only kinda resembles what the character should look like, lol.  I am fucked.  But I am still enjoying it and I look forward to class every week.  My teacher is super cute.  She has been teaching a long time and I think she goes at a good pace.  We also get to sing in class, which is fun :)

But you know what I hate?  Haha, everything?  lol.  But really.  The point in the fitness routine where you know you need to up the intensity of your workout.  Chunkaaas fitness involves a one hour workout 5-6 days a week.  I don't do weights, it's all cardio because weights are hard and boring to me.  It is usually something like run 2 miles, bike 15 mins, cross trainer 15 mins, run another 2 miles.  Thing is, I am doing it, but I know I could be getting a lot more out of it if I really exerted myself.  I am not cheating, I am just not trying my best.  I run at a really comfortable pace and I am completely zoned out on the bike.  I am pretty zoned during the run too.  And not "in the zone," but completely out of it.  Sometimes I do intervals, but like the weights, I think the sprints are really hard so I dont like it :(  I am comfortable in my routine, I can cruise right through it -- and they say you are never supposed to be comfortable!  So this weekend will commence Chunkaaas Upgraded Fitness Plan, which will involve sprints and attempted push ups.  At my old job where I was the only one there, I was practicing my push ups all the time!  I was actually getting better.  But now that I work around other people, I obvs cant be doing that.  Ughh, i want pizza.  

tackos and lollies

I need a makeover.  Desperately.  Not going to lie, I dont think I have ever been this ugly before.  Maybe in 5th grade when I got both glasses and braces in the same year.  Also, maybe at my prom...  but this is the ugliest since then!  My hair is both not dyed nor styled -- I had my last cut in dec and that was Mrs brady style.  I am still struggling with the bc's, causing my face to look like I am 15.  I have bought minimal clothes the last 2 years.  I dont wear make up and I dont blow dry my hair.  It is so bad that yesterday someone said "you look nice today."  I replied, "I do???"  to which she said, "yeah, you are wearing a headband."  ouch.

The Australian accent is killing me.  1st of all, I hate when people ask where my accent is from.  uh hum, I dont have an accent, you do!  They always want to know where specifically I am from in America and I when I say Boston, I get one of 2 responses.  Either they know Boston Legal or they don't -- in which case I say near New York which clears things up in most cases.  Boston Legal must have been big here, because that is always the only reason people know Boston.  2nd, you never want to hear an Australian person order Mexican food!  It's all fagitas this, tackos that.  Pina is pinna.  Pinnata.  And they switch the names of things!  Cilantro is coriander, shrimp is prawns, scallions are shallots, shallots are eschalot, bell peppers are capsicum, granola is muesli, oatmeal is porridge!  MAKE IT STOP!  And the absolute worst, candy is lollies.  "Mum, can I please have a lolly?"  NO.  

Ok, I will give some credit to Aussies.  They know their Asian food (makes sense I guess since I do live so close to Asia).  As much as I laugh because they dont know the difference between salsa verde and pico de gallo - I know SHIT about Indonesian and Malaysian food and they laugh at me when I try to order things like rendang sapi or even laksa...please tell me I am not the only person in the world who never heard of laksa before because it is a staple here!  I had my first laksa the other day --- noodle soup in spicy coconut milk.  Incredibly filling def not on chunkaas diet.  Not really my thing as it counteracts my chunkaas fitness plan, but was good to try.  If I had to choose between a burrito and a laksa, burrito any damn day!  And curries!  OMG, I dont know my curries! I was eating my rendang sapi the other day at work and someone asked me if I thought it tasted like a penang curry -- "uhhhh, idk, yeah, tastes good, errrr uhh little spicy."  So I guess I cant laugh (too much) at tackos.  

new plant shelf

Even though I want to move soooo bad, I do like the actual apartment I live in.  The guys have been gone a while, and this has really become "Al's place."  It hasn't been easy to decorate because I have such a limited budget.  I was just saying to someone the other day, the problem with moving around so much is you never get the chance to accumulate stuff.  And not one of the three of us is from this area.  So it's been hard to have to buy EVERYTHING -- couches, beds, silverware, plates, BBQ, washing machine, refrigerator, shelves, desk, chairs, tables, pantry stuff like spices, oils, hangars, kitchen appliances AND ON AND ON - we literally had nothing except a couple tvs.  So I am often frustrated with my "savings" account (lol), but then I remember how much we have had to put into this place to make it feel like home.

Anyway, today as I was admiring my awesome new plant shelf I got yesterday, I remembered that technically I am not supposed to live here.  It is supposed to be for just people in defense, and it is hard to imagine that 2 army dudes would have a million plants and hanging flower baskets on their balcony.  So probs the guys will not be as happy about Al's place as I am.  We do have inspections a couple times a year to make sure the place is kept tidy and nothing is broken -- when these happen I have to hide all my stuff (ie put away the cupcake pot holders and hide my clothes).  I am guessing I will be hiding the plant shelf and baskets too :(

It's mothers day today and I obvs miss my mom.  The last month has been really hard.  I am proud of myself that I have been able to keep it together and stay busy.  But I am so lonely!!!  I just cant wait til we dont live in Darwin anymore.  Darwin is small, very very small.  It's far away from everything, you cant drive to a single other city and just get away for a weekend.  Probably the closest city is Brisbane, a 3 hour flight!  And all the flights are so expensive because they are limited in service.  I miss America, my friends, and my family. UGHH

In good news (more good news in addition to my plant shelf!), I got a message that Jason will be home for a week in 2 weeks!  YES!  It is funny and it totally figures he comes home the same weekend my work is having a huge (huge for Darwin) conference that runs Thursday-Sunday.  Obvs I am totes skipping out on the Sat and Sunday.  They really only need me on the Thurs anyway.  But yay!  I can survive 2 more weeks.  Then he will be gone another 6 weeks after that.  The thing I am most looking forward to is eating normal food!  I cant be bothered cooking for myself and food is so expensive here, I never eat anything good!  Eggs, toast, veggies.  Pretty much it.  BLAH.

I learned a new Aussie saying this week.  They had a meeting at work about people attending that conference and how if you "go long grass" half way through, you wont get paid.  I am loving this saying!  Go long grass means you take off and disappear, lol.  Classic.